Friendship is Magic: The Line
by No Country For Old Men78
Summary: Captain Walker, unable to cope with the atrocities he committed in Dubai, decides to end it all with Konrad's M9, and is transported to a magical world of talking ponies. Will this new world help him conquer his demons through the power of friendship, or will its diabetes-inducing ambiance drive him closer to the brink of insanity? Rated T unless otherwise noted.
1. A Farewell to Arms

_(AN: Ok, first of all ye be warned there be crackfic ahead. Second this was originally in my other fic _Zulu Squad No Tsukaima_, but it was confusing a lot of first time readers so I removed them and gave it it's own fic. This is a sort of simultaneous sequel to it, but it stands on it's own. _Spec Ops: the Line_ belongs to Yager and MLP:FIM belongs to Hasbro. Hate if ye must, but don't sue.)_

_**"To kill for yourself is murder. To kill for your government is heroic. To kill for entertainment is harmless."**_

The hallucination of Colonel John Konrad smirked at Captain Walker's excuses.

"It takes a strong man to deny what's right in front of him. And if the truth is undeniable, you create your own. The truth, Walker, is that you're here because you wanted to feel like something you're not: A hero. I'm here because you can't accept what you've done. It broke you. You needed someone to blame, so you cast it on me. A dead man. I know the truth is hard to hear Walker, but it's time."

The scene morphed into a mirror, where Walker could see his reflection and Konrad's. Konrad was brandishing the same handgun as the one in Walker's hand.

"You're all that's left and we can't live this lie forever."

He pointed the gun at Walker.

"I'm going to count to five, then I'm pulling the trigger."

Walker shook his head.

"You're not real. This is all in my head."

"Are you sure? Maybe it's in mine? One."

Walker pointed his gun at Konrad.

"No... everything, all of this, It was your fault!"

"If that's what you believe then shoot me. Two."

Walker hung his head, his voice breaking.

"I-I didn't mean to hurt anybody..."

Konard shook his head.

"No-one ever does Walker. Three."

Konrad's words seemed tinged with regret and sympathy.

"Four. Is this really what you want Walker?"

Walker slowly put the gun under his chin. With a sigh Konrad spoke with the air of finality.

"So be it. Five."

Walker pulled the trigger, and heard a deafening explosion. In an instant he found himself surrounded by a white light. A soft feminine voice reached his ears.

**_"Captain Martin Walker, the man who so wanted to be a hero. But what you really wanted was peace, wasn't it?"_**

Walker looked around.

"Who are you? What do you want? Is this the afterlife?"

**_"Who I am is of little consequence, Captain Walker. I am here to grant you a boon that you wished for so much in life."_**

"Great, so if this is the afterlife am I going to be transported to Heaven filled with gorgeous babes?"

Even though he could not see the female speaker, he could tell that she was smiling.

**_"Yes, Captain Walker, in a manner of speaking you will be. You are going to a paradise filled with beautiful females. Most importantly, this is a place of peace, a peaceful place where you will never have to make life or death decisions or see your friends die."_**

Walker saw golden motes of light approach, and permeate his being. It was a sensation that reminded him of being immersed in a warm bath. He felt his conscious slipping.

**_"Welcome to your eternal reward, Captain Walker."_**

He lost consciousness. An eternity later, there was a disembodied voice talking. At first he couldn't make what was being said, other than the speaker was female. Then words started to morph together.

"C'mon sleepyhead! You gotta wake up!"

Walker slowly opened his eyes and was shocked to see a pair of large, moon-shaped eyes looking at him.

"There! That wasn't so hard was it? C'mon get up, you gotta help me!"

The voice sounded like a cheerleader high on helium and nitrous oxide. But that wasn't the most shocking thing. What shocked him was who the voice belonged to. It was a horse, a pink horse with a pink poufy mane. A talking horse. A talking pink horse. A talking pink horse with a poufy pink mane and a high-pitched voice, and apparently the size of an elephant and wagging her tail like an overexcited terrier. She was pulling covers off him and talking on and on about a surprise party for someone called Fluttershy. Walker pulled himself up and froze. His hand was all wrong. It was purple, for one thing, and had small, stubby digits that ended in claws. Fighting a rising panic, he ignored the prattling of the pink horse and crawled across the floor to a large mirror on the opposite wall. His reflection gasped. What stared back at him was a purple lizard with large, ice blue eyes and a green crest on the top of his head. He touched his face in disbelief, and the reflection followed. His shocked reverie was interrupted by the pink horse.

"Hey Spike, are you listening? I need you to run and get me ingredients for the cake!"

Walker spun around to face her.

"What-what did you call me?"

The horse went up and put her hoof up to what approximated his forehead.

"Are you okay, Spike? You're acting kinda funny."

"N-no, no this is a mistake, my name is Walker. Captain Martin Walker, Delta Force, Serial number 8675-309…"

He was interrupted by squealing laughter on the part of the pink horse.

"Riiiight, Spike you almost had me going. I didn't realize you were playing the name game. Okay, your name isn't Spike, it's Captain Walker, and my name isn't Pinkie Pie, it's Captain Prancer. You're funny!"

But the joke was lost on Walker. All Walker, aka Spike heard was the distant female laughter.

(_AN: yeah I feel a bit like that sadistic animator in "Duck Amok". In fairness I think Walker will adjust just fine in MLP:FIM. Maybe. Cue the evil laughter.)_


	2. MFWIC

_(AN: Because of the reaction I got to Walker's fate I decided to publish this quick drabble. I'm not particularly happy with it because I churned this out quickly this afternoon as a result of too much stress at work and not enough sleep last night. Because of the Cluster F Bombs being dropped at the beginning I'm rating this chapter Mature.)_

"Fuck you! Just shoot me! I'm standing right here! C'mon! Shoot me Goddammit! FUCKIN' SHOOT ME!"

Adams was in pain. He bled from multiple wounds that were reopened in the last battle. His body ached from sleep deprivation. But the worst was the mental feeling, like there was a rat scratching inside his skull. The mission was over; all he wanted to do was end the pain. He barely heard what was being said over the loudspeaker from the chopper. He genuinely wanted them to shoot him and end the pain. He looked over to Walker and saw him lower his weapon.

"Don't you dare!" He snarled at his CO. Walker dropped it.

"Well, fuck you, then. I didn't come this far to surrender."

"It's the only way inside that tower."

Anger boiled up inside Adams.

"For fuck's sake, give it up! The mission's over! We failed!"

"Not while I'm still breathing!"

Adams stared at Walker, and it seemed as though his eyes were opened for the first time. He saw just how far gone his CO was. He shook his head.

"Fine…then keep breathing."

He shoved Walker over the sandbags and watched him tumble to the ground.

"Run, motherfucker!"

He leveled his M249 Squad Assault Weapon at the chopper and opened fire. He screamed, but not in pain. He could feel bullets ripping through his body armor, piercing his leg, his right shoulder, and his chest, but still he felt nothing. He saw smoke billowing from the chopper's engine compartment and saw it go into a death-spin, spiraling towards him.

He opened his eyes and found himself surrounded in a white light. He looked down at himself and found that he had no wounds, that his uniform was clean and without any damage. He then heard a voice.

**_"Lieutenant Alphanso Adams, the obedient soldier. Your loyalty to your friends and your superior drove you to commit atrocities. It cost you your friend, and your sanity."_**

It was a distinctly feminine voice. Adams wasn't sure how to react to that.

"Yeah, whatever. Are you God? My guardian angel? Or the Devil welcoming me to where I deserve to go?"

**_"Who I am is of little consequence. I am here to grant your heart's desire. What is it that you wish for, Adams?"_**

He didn't answer, and he felt a calming presence in his mind, one that soothed the raging anger and washed away the maddening guilt that wracked his brain. A memory surfaced, of happier times in his younger days when he spent the summer helping at his uncle's restaurant in New Orleans, making beignets. The voice spoke again, softer this time.

**_"Ah. I see now. Very well, Adams, I will grant you what you wish. Welcome to your eternal reward."_**

He felt a jolt of pain, like electricity burning out his nervous system.

An eternity later, his senses gradually came around. The first was the sound of two voices speaking, a male and a female. The male reminded him of his old commander, before he joined Delta, the other reminded him of Lugo's mother, from the one time they met up on leave at Fort Hood. The second thing that hit him was a pleasant smell of freshly baked pastries, which reminded him of his uncle's restaurant.

"Dear I think he's coming around."

"I can see that, cupcake, give him some air."

Adams opened his eyes, and saw a ceiling. It wasn't Dubai, or even a military hospital. Then two heads appeared in his vision and caused him to sit up with a jolt. Two small horses, one was a yellow horse with an overbite and an orange mane and was wearing a bow tie and a baker's hat. The other was light blue with a pink mane and a frilly apron. Adams could barely process this when the yellow one spoke.

"Take it easy there, sonny. Seems like you've had a busy day."

The horse spoke! The insanity of it topped everything he had seen and done in the last 48 hours since they arrived in Dubai. His CO's slow descent into madness, Lugo's lynching, all this was nothing to two talking miniature horses. He abruptly sat up with and start and tried to stand, whacking his head on the low ceiling. He stifled a curse and sat back down.

The blue horse approached with a tray in it's mouth and set it next to Adams on the bed.

"Now, now dearie, you listen to my Carrot Cake and take it easy. Here, have some hot chocolate. It's my own recipe and will cure anything from a bad day to a broken heart."

Adams looked and the small mug, and took a cautious sip. He hadn't had a drink of water since since that bastard Riggs crashed the water trucks. In an irony fit for a fractured aesop his Camelback dispenser got ripped when his truck crashed into a roadblock. The liquid was warm but not too hot and tasted delicious. As the healing brew coursed down to his stomach he took in his surroundings, looking down at himself in the process. His wounds were cleaned and bandaged up, he seemed whole. He was in a small room with a bed, which was laying on, a small chest of drawers and a mirror. He noticed his SAW and M1014 combat shotgun were propped up against a wall, along with the battered remains of his body armor and load-bearing vest. He looked back to the two horses.

"Where am I?"

The yellow horse chuckled.

"Well, you're in Ponyville. Sugarcube Corner if you want to be specific. Applejack found you in the Everfree Forest and brought you here."

The blue horse cleared her throat. The yellow horse seemed embarrassed.

"Goodness gracious where are my manners? We haven't even introduced ourselves. My name is Carrot Cake, and this is my wife, Cup Cake."

"Lieutenant Alphanso Adams, United States Delta Force."

Adams belted out his name and rank mechanically, still trying to process the fact that there were talking horses in front of him. The names sounded vaguely familiar. He remembered when he was young that his younger sister had these small technicolored toy ponies that had weird names and smelled funny. He also remembered getting into trouble with his parents for snipping the tails off of one of her toys.

_"Mooooom! Alfie ruined one of my toys! He cut Applejack's tail off!"_

He jolted back to reality, or whatever this was.

"You're ponies? I remember my sister playing with talking ponies."

Carrot Cake laughed again.

"It wouldn't surprise me, sonny. We've seen your kind show up in Equestria, you're not the first, not even the first soldier to show up. Although-" he said as he eyed Adams' gear, "You're the first to show up who isn't in super power armor or weirdly powerful weapons."

He was interrupted by a rumbling noise, coming from Adams' stomach. The hot chocolate he had just ingested reminded his system that he hadn't eaten anything since the raid on the Radioman's tower. Cup Cake heard it and giggled.

"Sounds like someone's hungry. Why don't you come downstairs and have something to eat?"

Adams stood up and followed the two horses (no, ponies, he corrected himself) out of the room and down a flight of stairs. He had to stoop so as not to hit his head against the ceiling. The bottom of the stairs opened to a large open area that looked like an old-fashioned soda jerk counter, except it was fashioned out of gingerbread and sweets. Adams' thought that someone could get diabetes if you stared at the place too long. His musings were interrupted by the female pony speaking up.

"Pinkie! Pinkie Pie! Fetch me some fresh pastries, we have a guest, and by the sounds of his stomach he's brought the appetite of a griffon."

Adams was still staring at an intricately designed beam made of gingerbread and was only vaguely aware of a high-squeaky voice talking at the speed of sound. It was a second voice that pulled him out of his reverie.

"Adams?"

He spun around at the sound of his name being said. There was another horse (pony, he corrected himself again), this one was pink with a poufy mane and the source of the squeaky voice. The one who called him by name was a small purple lizard with a green crest. Adams cocked his head to one side. That voice sounded familiar.

"Adams?" The lizard repeated. "What are you doing here?"

Before he could respond the pink pony chirped up.

"Oh, you're Adams? I'm Pinkie Pie and this is my friend Spike." The pony paused for a minute. "Oops, I forgot we were still playing our name game. I'm Captain Prancer and this is Captain Walker."

Adams stared at the lizard.

"Martin? Captain Walker?"

The lizard couldn't speak but nodded miserably. The pink pony kept prancing about and talking very fast, oblivious to the goings on. Adams couldn't help himself. For the first time in a long time he laughed. A genuine, throw-your-head-back and wrack-your-gut laugh.

"Damn Walker, what the hell did you tell the lady in the white light?"

_(AN: And the sadistic animator continues to torment poor Walker. Honestly I'm not happy with this because I know absolutely nothing about _My Little Pony: FIM_, and have zero interest in finding out (no offense, it's just not my cup of java), so I'm not sure if I got the characters right. I figured I'd give Adams a break since he pretty much just went along with Walker as 'following orders.' This was originally just a one-shot for for my _Zulu Squad No Tsukaima_ fic, but due to interest I've turned this into a full-blown story. I don't know when I'll be expanding it, since I'm trying to wrap up the other story before I get into this one. So please be patient, and feel free to comment/follow/fav/jeer._


End file.
